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Dear User: Project's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
Dear User: Project

[ website | printedmatter.net ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[24 Nov 2004|02:07pm]

[ mood | predatory ]

I, Illune, Goddess of all that is worth anything, hereby retract my wide-swathing visage over the mortal realm. You people suck. No sacrifices, no love for the ice goddess...and too many stupid people abusing this journal.

Peace and Vengeance.



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Not normally given to apologies... [28 Oct 2004|01:10pm]

[ mood | devious ]

...but I will do so this once, in advance, in case I miss.

Desist in your attempts to distress the female, mortal, or judgement shall come from on high...

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failure of friendship [28 Oct 2004|01:08pm]

[ mood | thoughtful ]

The bonds between loved ones are a sacred and powerful thing, yet quite fragile as well. To some, it may seem best to keep things on a level of friendship but this does not make the tragedy of a failed relationship any less great.

There is much love in friendships as well but it can twist and turn in surprising ways. Say in the instance that a friend does something that another cannot see any rhyme or reason in. It may be that the injured party, in this case the friend in confusion, has deeper issues that are clouded but fuel their confusion. This can make the friend do or say things that do not make sense and, to the other friend that is the focus of this friend's ire, do more harm than good.

It is the failing of such bonds that I speak of. As the God of Love, I do hold some sway over matters pertaining to friends but there is so much that even an immortal may do when things go wrong. At least, in the instance where one friend has wronged another, I can lend an ear to the injured party and hear their grievance...

...of course, it can be difficult if not impossible to determine the truly injured party as most mortals are too full of themselves to realize they are not the one that is really in any significant pain.

For this confusion, I apologize.

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Answer to Rite of Midsummer [08 Jul 2003|03:36pm]

[ mood | annoyed ]

Dear Unworthy Mortals -

I regret to inform you all that the sacrifices for this year's Rite of Midsummer were completely and utterly insufficient. There was NOT a SINGLE virgin!!! What in all of Celtic Heaven does a Goddess have to do to get the bloody corpse of an untouched maiden here?? I was going to send unending snow and brutal winter to you all for this, but God wouldnt let me because He is on the Divine Rag...*mutters about men in positions of power*...so instead i have sent out letters to everyone's signifigant others and family members instructing them to love you all less. That is all for today....and remember: MASTURBATION IS AFFIRMATION!!! (now lets see some virgins burned on my altar kids...) ((and none of those...atrociously disfigured women like last year...i DO have taste...))

Lovingly Yours
Illune, Goddess of the Storm
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Answer to Prayer 2 [08 Jul 2003|08:12pm]

[ mood | surprised ]

Dear User,

Yes. And if it still hasn't happened, then wait a little longer. It will. I know that might be hard to believe, but you do have faith--otherwise you wouldn't be praying to me in the first place. I apologize if I'm sounding snippety, but I'm feeling a bit harried by believers who pray to me about losing faith. That just doesn't seem like very good logic. I have to go now. The goddess Illune just munched on my nipple.

Peace out.


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[06 Jul 2003|10:14pm]

Dear User

God kills Kittens

Just thought you should know.
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Answer to prayer..Yahweh [06 Jul 2003|02:29pm]

[ mood | clean ]

well David i do understand your plight...you want a car and your parents aren't willing to sacrifice their hard-earned money...in this day and age its perfectly understandable that you'd take such a rash stance on the subject...

but i frankly feel ur a sterile moron...your prayer will be answered with blindness and broken legs you filthy maggot..and perhaps i will burn your CITY DOWN....this sounds wonderful...anyone have a lamb i'm feeling frisky

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Answer to Prayer 1 [06 Jul 2003|08:09pm]

[ mood | sympathetic ]

Dear User,

I am sorry you were disappointed by the church service you attended this evening. I honestly can't help that the preacher did not know how to say the word herb correctly and pronounced it with the H. I may be omnipotent, but some people are just beyond being "saved". Besides, the world needs all sorts of people--intelligent, stupid, attractive, ugly--to make it a dynamic place for you humans to inhabit. I wish people would realize this and learn to be more accepting. I also wish that these songs they sing in my praises weren't getting to be so pop-rock, but neither of those things is going to change anytime soon. Just enjoy the diversity and realize that the unpleasant stuff makes the good stuff all the better.

To address another issue that was bothering you during the sermon, yes the Bible was written by me. Well, I didn't actually write the book. A bunch of men wrote it, but who do you think was responsible for the birth of these men and for the inspiration they needed to write such a great masterpiece? The Bible, after all, is merely a piece of divine art, and I am the muse of all artists, whether they realize it or not. And like all art, the Bible is subject to much interpretation. I hope you will not be offended by the ones given in the service you attended today. Instead you should take the service as an experience that has helped you learn and grow, because that is what I want for all my children--learning and growth. Some may grow in more damaging directions than others, but as I said earlier, I've given you all the freedom to choose destruction so that you may more fully enjoy creation.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go deal with some of the angels. They are molting right now and prone to get into nasty moods.

Until the next prayer,

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Let the LJ domination begin! [06 Jul 2003|08:03pm]

[ mood | amused ]

I found this community with no members and no entries. I am going to monoplize it for as long as I can. I may even adhere to the original intent of this community and write myself letters of apology from God. No one is around to tell me not to do it. Hahaha. *power trips and falls over*

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